my new years promises
- Start drinking again, I have been too darn happy lately and filling my body with depressants is obviously the way to go. Try to get drunk at least twice a day just to make sure I am doing it right.
- Start smoking again, I quit 2 years ago and well, I still want one. I will just give in to the craving and enjoy life much less. Hopefully get up to 2 packs a day to get more exercise for my lungs, I haven’t been coughing enough.
- Eat lots more fatty and high carb food and put on a lot of weight. I hate that smirk on my face when I look in the mirror, getting fat will fix that!
- Live more dangerously by uninstalling my anti-virus program that thought it was necessary to update itself for 10 minutes while I was in the middle of typing #3. It cares too deeply for the welfare of my PC and I love that it annoys the hell out of me at least once a day.
- Have less sex, being sexually satisfied is waaay overated and frankly bores me to tears.
- Be more rude to people I don’t know, why should I worry about being pleasant when it’s obvious they don’t give a damn.
- Be more rude to people I do know, that way they will know I at least care enough to go out of my way to be rude.
- Be kinder to telemarketers when I am busy making an imaginary $20,000 on Jeopardy reruns and they call and annoy the bejeesus out of me.
- Stop leaving comments at people’s blogs that I admire so they won’t feel so special anymore. I hate when they feel more special than me, so that’s gotta stop!
- Think more negative, being positive that things will get screwed up is bad for me, from now on I will be negative and know that things will not work out badly.
Just Kidding! Happy New Year!!

Sorry to tell you this, but I quit 15 years ago, and could eat a carton. I find myself standing downwind from people who are smoking, just to get that second hand stuff going on!
Have a great new year!
LOVE THESE!!!!
(and glad you were kidding too!)
Chloe
i thought you were resolved to get your cajun cowboy ass back to atlanta for a rock star weekend =)
Those are perfect! I may have to adopt those as my own… although I still drink on the weekends and smoke a pack a day. I guess I’ll just have to step it up, drink more, smoke more!
Oh, but can you still leave comments on my blog, I promise it won’t make me feel special. lol
Angi= ahh thanks for making me feel better!
and same to you hon! 
Chloe= hi hi! and thanks
Bitchcakes= that rockstar sex is still on backorder, all i got left is the 1 case Biker Sex xtra hot&nasty.
in fact i am holding it just for you!
Defiant= haha i just left a comment there lol and i also have been enjoying the van Gogh art works too.
check out the van gogh reference in this post.
hop
pop
You know I’m full of shit too!!!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
Neener
Nanner
Sounds like a prescription for a long healthy life!
It’s amazing that people who actually do follow the list ARE alive.
I know you don’t know me but I’m swiping #’s 6-10, okay? Considering I already do waaay to much of #’s 1-3, don’t have a clue about #4 and can’t agree with you on #5, that’s about all that’s left.
Great blog you have here!
That was great!
Thank you for the laughs.
I was worried after I read #1. I was thinking, “but what about his new liver?!?” then I got it. Funny stuff hon, happy new year to you too.
ohhhh…a FAKE new years list! gotta make one of those.
#1 go on a low carb diet.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!
better get crackin on that, then!
You sound way too healthy.
Happy New Year, Bro. You also forgot to light animals on fire and to give yourself a bikini wax
Inana= you are special no matter what the hell i say! and you know that too, you just wanted to see me say it
Jeanette= I agree with that, how do they live so long? sheesh…
Stacey= welcome to tha hideout and no I don’t mind, i am flattered.
Restless= your welcome!
Kristin= thank you and to you and Dearest
Regan= low carb would be your #1 huh hehe
Trashman= hey man, didn’t know you came here, welcome and ya i am happier when i am near death lol
Yeah, that Trashman! He gets around.
Actually, he’s following me around the Internet, he is MY stalker after all. (Don’t let him tell you any different.)
I’ll apply #6 to work… a little more often, anyway. Starting tomorrow morning!
I’m better at Wheel! Of! Fortune!! myself.
Oh, and I quit smokin oh probably comin up on 10 years ago now, after smoking for about 12. I tried to smoke one a couple years back and I about puked my guts out. Weird. I still ‘feel’ like I want one, but I know if I did I’d regret it bigtime, and so would my carpet.
Remember “Suicide Solution” by OZZY? Ahhhhh those were the days! Miss ya Randy
happy 2005 by favorite guy named seven. cheers, inky
Happy New Year, Seven!
I feel quite special now that you’ve commented on my blog! Thanks! My post wasn’t very interesting today, hope you come back for the ones about the orgies…=)
I love your list! Happy New Year.
Jeanette= you deserve lots of stalkers! umm that don’t sound quite right but you know what i mean hehe
Vicki= hi! and ya quittin smokin is a
weird thing to do, i still reach for
my shirt pocket to get one and then
i remember that i quit
inky= luv ya and same to you!
angel= same to you and look forward to more cool reading from you =)
varla= orgies are on the top of my “to do” list and can’t wait to read about yours!
Happy New Year everyone!!
one
happy
Have a great year you….great blogging